Critique. Credential. Consume. Commend. My head spins from the actions I so often self-impose. On some days, I am my merciless enemy and on others, my adamant advocate. Nearing forty in less than ten days has thrust me back into pools of deep reflection, one of my favorite hideaways, replete with endless epiphanies.
I ponder my practices, principles and preferences. I question my morals, maxims and meanderings. And I celebrate my achievements aligned with the adulation for my heroes, confident that those who keep us grounded essentially propel us farthest.
I’ve spent my last eight months, diligently chipping away at a proverbial base. In my mind’s eye, it is likened to preparing for the reveal of a sculpture. I’ve sketched a vivid mental picture of my future. It is intricately detailed, painstakingly crafted. Its curves are to be navigated with the greatest of care. Its beauty is to be enjoyed by the masses.
This work of art is housed not in marble nor vanity, but in aspiration – hewn from a desire to catalyze others’ dream realization from the actualizing of assumptions turned realities. Simply put, I believe.
I believe in the power of one’s passion to catapult them into pursuit of possibilities…Into the grasp of the gargantuan…Into the reach of the riveting. I believe in the endurance of the human spirit and its ability to counter crushing catastrophe with the fierceness of a conqueror, unwilling to acquiesce to defeat.
I believe – because of what I’ve experienced, and what I’ve seen – that failure is not a sentence, but a comma. It doesn’t denote closure, but exposure, for it reveals what not to do again and informs the willing learner of how to do it even better. I’ve learned new lessons every day…
I am incessantly gearing up for the next phase of my “big” reveal. I call it big because it helps me to imagine what I cannot see – in the dimensions of which I wish to achieve it. As I grow wiser, I am becoming more comfortable with who I am, less apprehensive about who I’ll be and as intent as ever to undergird my enthusiasm with the grit to carry me through.
If it applies to you, take inventory of your composite of characteristics. Examine their power and potential to uniquely impact those in your immediate sphere of influence. In you resides gifts and talents unrivaled by anyone we know. Share the bounty of the gift that is you. It is beautiful…
Your generosity could be life changing for generations.
It’s inescapable. That gnawing desire to do what you do best. That urging to allow your hands to create their masterpiece, whether process, product, project or presentation. That scintillating feeling you get when you submerge your mind in a plethora of passion. It’s what you dream…and when you catch those dreams, fulfillment is soon to follow – because you know you are achieving at the apex designed just for you.
No matter how many times I tango with darkening doubts and discouraging days (which I insist on keeping to a minimum), I am never able to suppress my sincerity to the point of hampering my hopes. I’m too easily inspired by the successes of the formerly sullen! Too eager to cheer and champion the downtrodden!
Every day, whether I’ve accomplished my daily objectives or not, I am reminded of why I #LOVE what I do – speaking, writing, educating – because of the indelible impact it has on others. So today, after many long nights of planning and pondering, purposing and picturing, proving and prefacing I’m now – proclaiming…that there are more elements to #catchingyourdreams that I’d like to share…
And here’s the first. The essence of #catchingyourdreams is that it entails “realizing the goals of maximizing your gifts.” How so? Because when you identify what your gifts are, it is incumbent upon you to spread them, working to improve the lives of others through the affirmative influence that you have. Take your talent and…love it. Nurture it. Grow it. Use it to the best of your ability, but if nothing else – don’t squander it. It is far too valuable. It is…divine!
Why does this matter if it matters at all? Because gifts can change lives! Perhaps your voice is one that can pierce a soul. Maybe your music can soothe the severest of maladies. Your art could invoke insight that could leave masses speechless. Or your writing could rock a nation.
For those who follow me closely on and off line, you are aware that 2017 has been designated as my year to “LEAP” – Let Excellence Accelerate Progress. So taking the advice that I’ve so liberally given, I’m feverishly working to engage, educate, encourage and empower in an unprecedented fashion…
I’ve mentioned a few gifts out of millions that you may or may not have, but broad are the talents that we possess as individuals, and even wider are the opportunities to use them – and bless others through them – in countless ways. What can you do…that only you can do the way you do…and are you doing it enough to make the difference of a lifetime?
If not, there’s no time like the present! Your goal should be to take what you have and make magic that the world has never seen. The audience is waiting…and so am I. #catchyourdreams.
Ever been on an ice rink? With ice skates? It can be challenging. Ever been on an ice rink, without ’em? They have. Don’t worry. They didn’t desecrate the rink, we made sure to get permission. Invited to a private party, these boys took advantage of a rare opportunity to do the unexpected. While there was a previously determined mode of operation, they struggled a bit.
But while many others went with the standard, they broke out of their comfort zones and considered the possibilities. What a way to break the ice! What transpired next could be only be categorized as relentless excitement; pint-size, but pleasant pandemonium – and an adventure to remember.
So often, we find ourselves in situations that may be foreign. Perhaps, your background is not the same as your peers or associates. There are certain elements that you recognize, but maybe you struggle a bit. Perhaps your challenge lies in the fact that you haven’t considered the possibilities beyond face value. Maybe there’s another way you could look at it, that would still give you the leverage to excel.
Am I saying break the rules? No. I’m saying, explore your options. Think differently. Pursue diligently. Strategize incessantly. Sometimes it’s not asking questions that matters. It’s the questions that you ask!
I enjoyed a wonderful conversation with a friend on yesterday whom I’ve known since elementary. He’s a passionate, prolific family man who has a wonderful career and a beautiful wife and children. While he’s done considerably well in his profession, he’s pursuing another lifelong passion that he placed on a back burner while life happened.
Unregretful of his decision to table it earlier, he’s now ready to pick it up and move forward. So he’s preparing! My favorite part? He’s conditioning himself mentally for his new pastime/future career in a manner parallel to how he prepared himself as a middle school, high school and college athlete. He’s molding his mindset.
He’s allocating designated time to dedicate to the development of his craft. He’s researching, studying and practicing for perfection…because he has an end goal in mind. I’m convinced he’s going to get there…because he’s not afraid to step out of his comfort zone and get on the rink with an approach that perhaps others – haven’t seen yet.
If you take a moment to consider success stories you’ve seen and heard, rarely do they achieve the unthinkable by majoring in the mundane. They think differently. They pursue diligently. They strategize incessantly. I’m positioning myself to do the same in order to catch my dream. Are you ready to catch yours, too? Break the ice…and Leap with Me. Adventures await… #imsmiling
It was a clear message. Beautifully adorned. Simply written. Unable to be misinterpreted. You were not to park in this designated space.
It didn’t pertain to me so much, as I wasn’t driving. I was on my sabbatical – walking, perusing, relaxing, but as always…deeply thinking. And as I stared at the sign, I had “A Beautiful Mind” moment, where I saw less of what was immediately in front of me and more the analogous layers of complexity that nestled beneath this sign.
“No Parking” for me holds a different message. It’s an admonition for those who are going into the upcoming year with all of the baggage that weighted them down in months prior. It’s a declaration for others who are planning to be sidelined because of obstacles they’ve encountered and battles they’ve already conceded.
It’s an expectation for those who are determined to realize unachieved goals. It’s a declaration to those they insist on bringing along. Their encouragement is for more than themselves, and they won’t allow the naysayers to be the dreamslayers.
As I hear about (what seems like) another death everyday, I cannot help being thankful for each breath of life. The year is not yet over, and there are many who still won’t see 2017. Who’s to know who will be counted in that number?
But if it isn’t you or me, then what? What do we do with the precious lives we have left to live? Spend it wisely! Live it loudly! Do what we love the most!
Among my self-determined expectations is to ensure that I submit to “No Parking” in areas where I need not stay put. I won’t park in depression, dismay, delusions nor disdain.
I’m not going to park anywhere that’s going to deter me from my focus, shifting my energy to draining instead of gaining. I am going to plow forward; work fervently; learn greatly and fight passionately.
Reflectively, 2016 has certainly been the most trying of my life. I’ve cumulatively lost some of my greatest loves, which has shaken me to my core. And unforeseen obstacles in people and places have also left me spinning, shocked at how calamity can be so rampant in what was perceived to be community.
I’ve hurt in ways that I didn’t know was possible, often angry at myself for having human emotions.
Nevertheless, I will not wallow. I will not wish. I will want it (my dreams) badly enough to make it happen, and when I can’t find the way I want, I will find another way, like so many amazing achievers before me.
I will draw from the strength of those who loved me most, and I will listen to what my family, friends, readers, and clients need before I consider what I’ll say.
I am confident that as I Leap into 2017, there’ll be no idling for me. Time is of the essence.
Let’s get ready for this road trip. Where are you going? Send me a map.
I almost did it. I almost took her home. Forever. Because her grandmother said I could have her. I thought about all the little men running around the Brown home and how much I am madly in love with my tribe, but I couldn’t get away from that subtle inclination to have that pinkness in my house!
I loved the lace dress. The blue-green eyes. The tiny tights. The diamond earrings and the clinging that she did for what felt like hours, but I floated back into the realm of reality and finally conceded to letting her go. Nevertheless, I realized that even if I didn’t take her home, I’m still on a path to potentially impact her life. I’m making magic and memories – for everyone…
I’ve received more texts and phone calls and emails than normal lately, particularly in reference to my renewed interest in charging ahead on catching those dreams. I’ve been most delighted though!
In a weekend conversation, I learned that one Dreamer has already started journaling and planning to develop a portfolio for future intentions of becoming a model. Another Dreamer wanted to develop a specialized curriculum that they hadn’t seen in any of the Districts surrounding them.
Another Dreamer on a path that parallels my own has been in the planning stage of consulting aspirations and found herself being pursued by interested clients that she never expected to meet.
An enthusiastic Dreamer from last week relayed the unveiling of a project that he and a partner have worked on for two years. Overflowing with ideas, we’ll be meeting soon to determine a timeline to help them makes those moments of innovation into milestones of reality.
My favorite responses? Those that have been contacting me to let me know that they’ve already gotten started on the homework assignment from this weekend! I’m trying to contain my own excitement because I’m thrilled that I’m able to share this journey with others who are ripe for realization. Which gets me back to the future Dreamer in the picture.
We too often forget how the reality of our dreams affects others.
For every story I hear of those that are ready to leap, there are ten more that share why they just can’t do it. Some cite time, money, or support; but, I remind them that their decision isn’t limited to changing their world, it can change the worlds of others. That’s the magic.
Touching others with your tenacity! Inspiring them to dream because they see yours coming to fruition! Making memories that make history…and move others to do something great…
That young lady who wants to become a model is choosing a new segment of the industry that focuses on unconventional beauty and steers away from the status quo.
She’s considering in part because of many teens who have already expressed how they look up to her as she defies what beauty was perceived to be and defines, in her own right, what beauty is. She’s ready for the next step.
That educator, who met the clients she wasn’t expecting, almost didn’t attend the meeting she was invited to. She thought age gaps might be a factor and that others may not have enough in common with her in spite of her efforts. She fought those feelings of doubt and pressed forward to that meeting, contending that it was one of the best experiences of her professional career.
I’ve toyed with the idea of penning a book for years. And after starting and stopping, starting and stopping received a post two days ago that said, “Have you written any books yet? If so, let me know. I would love to read any you write.” #confirmation…
If you’re still sitting on those ideas; those passions; those goals, those unrepentant, untapped, unfulfilled dreams. Stop squelching them!
Because you don’t live and operate in isolation, those inclinations – whether they are within your current profession, a part of your personal goals or something that could impact communities within and abroad – they’re yours; stamped with your originality and authenticity. Who better to do it than you?
If you extinguish your fire, you won’t be the only one who suffers from the loss. So will those around you who could be greatly benefited by your best efforts. This is the season of giving, right? Give us your best. We’re dying to see what’s in store.
I wish I could say, “I can do it all.” I’d like to. I’d like to know it. To see it. To have it. To make it. To sing it. To write it. To say it. To play it. To create it, find it, feel it. And maybe even fake it. And sometimes – I can… Because…I’m a fixer. I think I’ve been tasked by the Lord to fix every problem known to man – because if I could just find the solution, life would be better for everyone. Or at least that’s what I’d like to believe… Sometimes.
But, what I’ve learned when I sink back down into my reality of life on Earth, is that not only am I unable to fix everything – I am actually guilty of the unthinkable sin – forgetting. I forget that in my humanity, I will make mistakes, more often than I prefer and in the times that I’d wish I could make them go away the most. I forget that even if I sometimes feel invincible, life can go on in my absence. I forget that when I don’t pull it together, it affects the ones I love the most.
I forget that my minor mistakes will not turn the corporate world upside down. I forget that some people who say wonderful things about me are only pretending, and I should get over my hurt feelings quickly, because those people are everywhere I go. I forget that people I love may hurt me by accident, but I must still love them on purpose.
Here lately, I’ve forgotten some things that were more important. I forgot to remember to chase what I love…
I forgot that in the midst of doing a good job at my job, and doing a good job for my family, and a good job for my friends and a good job for my students and a good job for my clients, to do a good job at remembering me. And so I’ve watched the dreams that I’ve been attempting to catch, almost wash away. That was scary. I forgot to love me.
I forgot, what I loved…because I haven’t made the time to love it the way I used to.
Time up.
So I’ve decided that instead of losing myself in the world-of-being-overwhelmed, I’m going to lose myself instead – in love. In the people I love. The things I love. The places I love. In loving myself…and the One who loves me most.
Every time I learn that someone has “passed on,” I am reminded of how fragile and temporary our lives are here. Losing my dad…has still hurt me the most, to date. I know I can’t stop myself from losing anyone else, as everyone has their appointment with Him. But knowing our lives are limited, it makes me want to love more, and deeply; meaningfully; genuinely. Because if I don’t, my opportunity to express – or feel – that love, may go away.
So here are my tips and tidbits.
Celebrate every sunset. Cherish every cloud. No two are the same. You should treasure them both – and everything that is equally beautiful!
Say, “I love you,” whenever you can. You may think they know it, but you don’t say it nearly as often as you should. It feels so much better to hear it.
Forget about the expensive things. They’re nice, but overrated. Remember that things that are unique to the ones you love are the most special of all. Show them that you thought about them so much, that what you’re sharing wouldn’t be special to anyone else except them.
And lastly, remember that love isn’t just for the person you date or marry. You have more relationships than you know. Show everyone you love how much you love them. It will last for a lifetime.
I know who I love the most…and I’m so glad, they love me.
So I’ve been purging. Sometimes, cleaning various rooms, making the hard decision to separate myself from student papers that are older than some of my children; parting with items that I can no longer validate holding on to; removing relics that I recognize my husband was right in gently sharing with me that they were fairly purposeless and collecting dust, and for very brief moments – trying to soak in some sun, celebrating the most beautiful days, when the heat is not unbearably sweltering.
I’m still working like a queen bee, hovering over countless tasks, enjoying the work. I’m thrilled about new ideas, blossoming relationships and enthused clients, but I’m still trying to remember balancing business with bolstering memories. It’s been challenging; in part because the media of late has swirled with realities that I find heart wrenching, and while I want to remain informed, I toil with severing my connection to the tube. I feel it has betrayed me, offering me more opinions and slanted views than facts and fairness.
Nevertheless, irrespective of my entrepreneurial priorities, I was easily compelled to shut down my office the day after I received my own earth shattering news: my three year old was going on his first field trip…to Discovery Green. It was time to celebrate.
Interestingly, when I allow myself to submerge beneath the surface of conversational courtesies and pleasant exchanges of political rhetoric, I engage in quite a bit of self-talk. I ask myself reflectively for answers that sometimes remain unearthed. More importantly, I consider the impact of the world in which we live, or rather the decisions we’re making while in it. And in my queries of how deeply I’m affected, I find myself consistently turned towards those who’ll remain long after we’re gone. Our children.
It reminds me of countless things, but I’m opting to share a few – some out of mere adoration and others, out of unspoken obligation. Acutely aware that you may find a connection from a vantage point that I’ve not considered at all, it is my hope that my thoughts will at least tickle your fancy, and if not, then perhaps you will still find something for your enjoyment.
That being said, I am reminded first of the purity of love. Amazing, isn’t it? That it comes in so many shapes and sizes? That we can love our spouses; our children; our siblings; our parents; our families; our friends; our pets; our passions. That it is encompassed in a word so simple, but espouses such emotional depth…it leaves me speechless.
I watched three of my four boys (as the youngest turned four months last week) with incessant affection as they ran through the cooling waters that cascaded over their soft, brown skin. And all I could think about was how much I loved them.
I think they loved…getting wet; the carelessness of their disposition. The fact that they had no responsibilities, requirements, regrets, rebuttals. They were enjoying the soothing spheres of liquid joy and savoring the signs that pleasure was plenty. And I was elated.
For a moment, I also remembered the plausibility of pain. I jumped just a bit if they got too close to someone else’s child, hoping there would be no unnecessary confrontations. I worried that they might stumble or fall on the concrete beneath the water and injure themselves badly.
I was anticipating their disappointment when I’d tell them we’d have to go, knowing they would stay until the park had closed if they could. I worried that despite my best efforts, they’d still want to do more than the fun-filled day I’d already planned. And then I thought a bit more broadly.
I thought about the confrontations I couldn’t guarantee they wouldn’t have – in life. Not because of how they look, but really because of what they are – human. And as humans, we will always have conflict.
I thought about the obstacles and incidents that I won’t be able to protect them from years from now. I thought about when they’ll fall, and I won’t be able to pick them up. And I won’t be able to hold their hand. And I won’t be able to kiss their knees or rub their broken hearts, or make the pain go away. And I felt – scared. And helpless. And vulnerable.
But I also remembered, what my husband and I are teaching them. I know what we believe. I know in Whom we trust and how far His reach extends beyond what we could ever understand. And that comforts me greatly. Quite frankly, I don’t think I could have peace without Him – because I don’t have all the answers. And as much as I’d like to be Superwoman, sometimes I think I have more kryptonite than kudos.
I have no idea what will be the future of my Final Four Brown Boys…but I have high hopes and great expectations, whatever their choices may be. I know life will have its share of obstacles, and I’ll endeavor to do my best to help them through each and every one; but when I can’t, I will pray. And when I can, I will still pray…because I believe we should pray without ceasing (smile).
And I hope that the love and patience and kindness with which we’ve raised them will wash over their fears of tomorrow. Moreover, I hope that what they’ve learned from us, they will inherently share – and change the lives of others with the faith that moves mountains.
I savor everyday that they linger in innocence, and I hope they take their liquid joy and let it rain over their future. I think we could all benefit from more of this kind of rain. It’s time to use it to raise a generation that recognizes what we need most…
Caption: When loving and laughter are pure and simple. #itstimetocleanseourminds
